Thoughts

Why do people say you’re not ready? Do yourself a favor. Take some time and think about what you want. Recover from your last relationship. Even though you think you are not affected, you are. After my marriage, I was ready to move on cause I had been thinking about it for years. After my first long relationship after being separated. I needed to recover. Cause They don’t want to wait. They don’t’ want to waste their time if you end up back with your ex Personally, I think it’s a way to say that “they” don’t want to go through what you are about to go through. You’re in for a lot of ups and downs in your mental, financial and family life. Mentally it’s hard. You’ll feel finally free to do what you want. You’ll feel alone. You’ll feel like you’re not worth dating. You’ll ask yourself, what’s wrong with me? Why don’t people want to date me? You’ll think that someone is perfect. Then find out they are nothing like you thought they were. You’ll find that someone is exactly what you were looking for just to find out they are nothing that you really want. A lot of things are going to go through your mind; good and bad. It really takes time to figure out what you want. Where you are in life. Where you are mentally and where you are emotionally. Your life has changed since you last dated, possibly 20 years ago. You have different goals in life. You’re smarter. You possibly have kids. You may have a house. You have different responsibilities. You have to ask yourself where that new person in your life fits in. If they fit in? If you have kids, they won’t be happy. No matter what the new person is like. They are not their mom or dad. They want their parents together. It’ll be hard on you too. If you don’t see them all the time, you will want to. It’s the little things you’ll miss like; what foods they like, what clothes they wear, what tv shows they watch, if they even watch tv. You’ll get parts of a whole story. For example, your ex’s new partner doesn’t like your kid. Well, does your kid like that new person? The new person doesn’t feed my kid. Well, maybe your ex told them not too. Maybe your kid doesn’t come out of their room so the new person doesn’t even know that the kid is in the house. The point is, you just don’t know the whole story. And you never will. Al the stories are heresy. The stories will be tainted. People will cover up the truth. They will slant it in their favour. And, there is nothing you can do. Remember, you are the adult. Your kids need to know you’ll always be there for them. Even if they don’t want you around. One day, they will need you. They will always be your kids. And you will always be there parent. However, it’s important to remember that you deserve to be happy. You can’t let your children steer your life. It’s not healthy. It’s up to you what your love life will be. Of course, you can decide that your children are your life. You don’t need a love life. But you do. Your kids will have a life of their own. Don’t expect them to want you around all the time. And… don’t let them take advantage of you either. They can’t expect you to be around all the time. You have a life. Live it.